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Sunday, January 5, 2014

Dua Puluh Satu

Reading time: 3-5 minutes



Bukan, maksud tulisan kali ini bukan untuk membahas bioskop yang memang identik sekali dengan nomor 21. Saya memang suka nonton film di bioskop, tapi saya rasa bukan saatnya saya menceritakan film-film layar lebar yang saya sukai.

Angka dua puluh satu bisa banyak maknanya. Tapi kali ini, saya memilih untuk membahas angka dua puluh satu yang paling dekat dengan kehidupan saya tepat hari ini. Usia saya yang baru saja bertambah!

Penting? Sebenarnya saya pikir awalnya nggak penting-penting amat sih. Toh setiap tahun juga semua orang mengalami hal yang sama, tentunya di tanggal-tanggal spesial mereka masing-masing.

Apa karena usia yang kedua puluh satu yang membuat hal tersebut jadi spesial? Well karena saya perempuan, sepertinya tidak perlu seheboh anak laki-laki yang biasanya merayakan ulang tahunnya yang ke-21. Benar sih ini usia legal, dan artinya saya sudah boleh minum-minuman beralkohol. Tapi saya sudah pernah sih minum yang beralkohol, walaupun hanya 5% kadar alkoholnya.

Ngomong-ngomong, di usia saya yang ke-21 ini (oke, dan saya mulai merasa tua hanya dengan mengetik kalimat tersebut) saya jadi sadar beberapa hal. Saya nggak tahu apakah pembaca sekalian juga merasakan hal yang sama, jadi kalau ada komentar monggo dituliskan atau disampaikan langsung ke saya ya :)

"Tua itu pasti, dewasa itu pilihan"

Klise ya? Setiap saya mendengar atau membaca kata-kata di atas memang komentar saya kurang lebih "Ya iyalah jelas" atau "Ya ya ya udah tau". Tapi setelah menyongsong usia yang lebih lanjut (kemudian saya terdengar seperti seorang lansia), terutama karena perkuliahan sudah mau habis, melihat orang tua yang sudah tidak semuda dulu lagi, dan menyadari bahwa sebentar lagi saya akan mendapatkan tanggung jawab penuh atas diri saya sendiri, makna kalimat di atas menjadi pendorong supaya saya bisa jadi lebih dewasa lagi dalam menjalani hidup.

Belajar Bersyukur

Entah kemasukan apa, tahun ini saya menyadari banyak hal yang harusnya setiap tahun, nggak, setiap hari, harus saya syukuri di dalam kehidupan saya. Tahun ini saya sangat bersyukur untuk kehadiran sebuah keluarga di sekitar saya, hal-hal yang sudah saya dapatkan selama 21 tahun, semua hal yang sudah saya lewati. Mungkin tahun-tahun lalu saya nggak terlalu memikirkan soal ini. Entah kenapa tahun ini saya merasa ingin lebih menghargai apa yang saya miliki.  (Semoga belum terlambat untuk bertobat)

Ucapan selamat yang semakin sedikit

Awalnya saya sedih sih, menyadari bahwa setiap tahun semakin sedikit orang yang mengucapkan selamat (atau paling tidak, tahu kalau saya berulang tahun di hari tersebut). Saya masih ingat deh waktu SMP atau SMA, hari ulang tahun itu hari yang paling repot untuk membalas satu persatu sms ucapan dari teman-teman sekelas. Kalau sekarang bisa jadi orang-orang yang saya kenal tahu saya berulang tahun karena kebetulan sedang online di Facebook (Tapi saya tetap berterima kasih karena sudah mau menghabiskan waktu menuliskan ucapan buat saya). 

Tapi..
Kemudian saya mencoba melihat mereka satu persatu. Ucapan yang tadi saya sebut "Cuma sedikit".
Mereka yang mengirimkan saya pesan singkat "Selamat ulang tahun ya Janet, semoga panjang umur, sehat dan sukses selalu".
Dia yang mau menelpon tepat jam 12 malam dan menyebutkan sendiri harapan-harapan positifnya untuk saya.
Dia yang repot-repot mengirimkan kado dan kartu berisi birthday wish untuk saya padahal tinggal kurang lebih 700 km dari tempat saya tinggal.
Atau pun mereka yang dengan kreatifnya mengedit foto-foto aib saya dan membubuhkan ucapan selamat ulang tahun.

Saya nggak mendapat sedikit. Saya mendapat banyak. Lebih dari banyak.
Bahagia itu sederhana ya. Sesederhana merasa punya arti lebih untuk orang-orang yang kita sayangi.


Mengambil kesimpulan dari beberapa hal-hal yang saya sadari di atas, ternyata tahun dua puluh satu saya mungkin bukan pesta mewah, ucapan selamat dan wishes dari ratusan orang, atau kado-kado menumpuk.

Tahun dua puluh satu ini waktunya saya menghargai semua hal-hal kecil yang sekilas terlihat sangat sepele, tapi mempunyai makna yang paling penting di antara semua hal yang ada.



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Untuk semua

Obrolan-obrolan tanpa arah,

Tawa lepas,

Senyuman penuh arti,

Kata-kata penyemangat,

Nasihat dan teguran yang menguatkan,

Waktu yang berharga,

Bahu tempat bersandar,

Pelukan yang menenangkan,

Perhatian yang tidak terbagi,

Rasa percaya,

dan arti sebuah keberadaan.


Terima kasih.

Janet

Saturday, December 28, 2013

Why wouldn't you make a New Year's Resolution?



Reading time: 5-7 minutes

First of all, Merry Christmas everyone! I was actually thinking of writing about Christmas, but I ended up not writing any special post about it. So now, I'm gonna talk about what most people make in the end of the year, and abandon 2 or 3 months after (or even earlier than that). 
Yes, it's the so-called "New Year's Resolution".
I find New Year's Resolution kinda amusing, because it gives so much sparks and spirit to everyone who makes it (at first), before it turns into a "burden" and makes you go "nyeh" and "mehh".

I'm not gonna lie, I can still remember how I made several new year's resolutions and didn't really achieve any of them, like learning how to cook and learning how to drive a car-- I did learn a few times but didn't have the time to really commit to it. 

I reviewed as many resolutions that I could remember and read several articles about why we fail our new year's resolutions. Here are three reasons for failing to achieve one's stated goals (Baumeister and Heatherton 1996, as cited by Koestner, 2008, p. 61):


1. Unclear and vague goals.


It's better to state  "I'm gonna lose 20 kg this year" rather than "I'm gonna lose some weight".


2. Failure to follow up and measure our progress


It's better to weigh yourself every Monday rather than feeling your pants to know if it has loosened like you want it to.


3. Weak self-control and self-regulation when facing challenges


And this is probably the root of all failures when we're holding onto our New Year's Resolution. We tend to compromise our goals and add a lot of excuses to support it. 

Now that I know why I (almost) always failed in my New Year's Resolutions, I am planning not to fail in my 2014's Resolutions. After a week of sleepless nights, thinking of what should be my 2014's resolutions (nah, just kidding, it didn't take that long) I came up with a set of New Year's Resolutions, or what I call "My impulsive New Year's Resolutions".

1. Read books.


I used to love reading books, then the era of comic books came. Then movies. Then internet has ruled my world (I bet it rules your world too). I have friends who read books, and seeing them made me realize that I am missing so much things by not reading books.
If you ever heard someone said "Why read books? Everything is on the internet now, idiot" and you are buying that, you are on the wrong track. E-books are surely nice, but can you stand reading a 300-paged-book on your computer screen? I honestly can't. So starting next year, I'm planning to start reading a book for each month. Wait for me, my intelligent-full-of-knowledge friends.


2. Run.



As much as I want to run from reality (And you know you want to do that as well, folks) What I mean by "run" is I want to literally start running as a part of my routines. As you know, running has become a trend, and from that trend, I say "Why don't I turn it into a healthy habit?". I used to play basketball back when I was in high school but now running really seems like an easier sport with no-less health advantages than basketball. By easier I mean I don't have to arrange time with friends who play basketball. Running? There are more fellows you can just ask to run with you.
I did my first 5K run last week. It was exhausting, but so refreshing that it feels like you've washed your brain when you're done with the running. So I'd like to start running every week.


3. Blog.



Yes. Blog. I know my relationship with blog has been on and off (really). The first time I started blogging, I was so expressive that I never really filtered what I was writing. Then I thought that I should make a brand new blog to not only showcase my ideas, but to also give helpful information for the readers in some ways. It turned out that becoming too concerned about what I post on my blog only made me a worse blogger. The second blog stopped, and I just started a new one. This blog. 
In 2014 (and so on) I want to just share. I'm learning to take the phrase "Sharing is Caring" seriously, and therefore that's what I'm gonna do consistently from now on.


I would love to add a lot of other resolutions, and I do know there are things I want to fix or achieve (something that goes like "I want to ace my final exams, I want to finish my ultimate thesis--there I said it, and graduate, and get a job or a master's degree scholarship overseas", and so on).

But to me, those are part of my life goals. (I. should. get. them. done. I really should).
While New Year's Resolutions to me are simple and measurable things that I wanna get to improve my quality as a human being.

New year's resolutions are there not to become your burdens, not to change you and push you to become what you are not. So pick your own new year's resolutions that you think would make you feel good, look good, or get more out of life. :3


Let's start!






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Quick facts:
Top 10 New Years resolutions for 2014 according to University of Scranton. Journal of Clinical Psychology
Published: 12.13.2013

RankTop 10 New Years resolutions for 2014
1
Lose Weight
2
Getting Organized
3
Spend Less, Save More
4
Enjoy Life to the Fullest
5
Staying Fit and Healthy
6
Learn Something Exciting
7
Quit Smoking
8
Help Others in Their Dreams
9
Fall in Love
10
Spend More Time with Family

Type of Resolutions (Percent above 100% because of multiple resolutions)Data
Self Improvement or education related resolutions47%
Weight related resolutions38%
Money related resolutions34%
Relationship related resolutions31%

Full statistics? Click here.
© Janet Valentina
Maira Gall